The White Room
by ValkrieCrow
Summary: FMA, Harry Potter, Sailor Moon crossover. Welcome, Ladies and Gentlemen, to insanity. Welcome...to the White Room.
1. Prologue

Prologue

The room was white.

Not off-white, not egg-shell white, not white-with-red-polka-dots.

Just white.

It also had no door.

And it had no corners, which would mean that is was circular.

Now why would there be a circle shaped white room you might ask? You might also ask why this circle shaped white room contained six white fold-out chairs.

Mighty strange, don't ya' think?

Now…would it be strange to consider the fact that six fictional characters of other people's imaginations would be set in this room, and viewed for our own sick pleasure?

No?

Then…have I got the story for you…


	2. Chapter 1

TWRCH1

We begin with a flash of light. And coming from this light, are six poor souls. Now these six poor souls all come from different fandoms, give or take a few. Let's meet them, shall we?

At one end of The-Circle-Shaped-Room (TCSR) are two girls.

Two pretty girls…

…who can kick your ass.

You might want to feel bad for the boys.

One of these girls is a blonde, and in every sense of the word blonde, is a bit slow. She wears the traditional Japanese school uniform. She's also short, and has blue eyes.

The other girl is the polar opposite, standing almost two heads taller than the Blonde One, and has wavy chestnut hair, which is tied back in a ponytail. Now to most people, she would seem to be just like a teddy bear, and, to top it all off, she has green eyes.

Unfortunately… (For them, not for us) she also has a bit of a temper.

The Tempered One's green eyes are focused on the room, searching for any possible escape route.

The Blonde One's blue eyes are focused on a guy.

Have you guessed who they are yet? No? Too bad! I'll just let you keep guessing.

I'm so evil aren't I?

Now then, the one who the Blonde One's eyes are fixated upon looks a bit uncomfortable. He is currently shifting from one foot to another, and is eyeing the Blonde One as if she is about to pounce like Phil Margera to a sandwich.

The Shifting One is tall, and looks to be Asian. He is wearing what looks to be a military uniform, accompanied with white gloves (containing some sort of symbol on one of them.) The uniform is navy blue. His eyes are black. His hair is black.

Coincidence?

Next to the Shifting One stands…well…The Short One.

The Short One is short. The Short One has blonde hair. The Short One wears all black. The Short One wears a long red overcoat. The Short One's overcoat has a symbol on the back. The Short one is looking curiously at the room.

The Short One will kill you if you call him the Short One.

Know who they are? I bet you do!

On the other side of the Short One, are two men.

Well, one man, and one almost-man.

The Man and the Almost-Man are glaring at one another

The Man is wearing black robes, and has greasy black hair. In fact, his hair is so greasy, something is living in it. And the Man has named it Yodel. He is also extremely pale.

The Almost-Man is also wearing robes, but unlike the Man, his robes have color. Red and gold in fact, with a patch on in with a picture of what looks to be a lion. The Almost-Man has green eyes, unruly dark hair, glasses which have most definitely seen better days, and a scar shaped like a lightening bolt.

Now if that's not a dead give away, I don't know what is.


	3. Chapter 2

Let's have a recap.

There is a Circle-Shaped-Room, called…The-Circle-Shaped-Room. (TCSR) And in TCSR are six people; two to each fandom. And these six people are going to be left in TCSR for our own sick amusement.

Goody.

So we have the Blonde One, the Tempered One, the Shifting One, the Short One, the Man, and the Almost-Man to play with. In one moment, I will reveal their identities. But first, let's see how they're doing…

The Blonde One is no longer merely _staring _at the Shifting One. Oh no…she is drooling at the sight of him. The Shifting One is of course aware of the Blonde One's attention so he is…well…shifting away.

Yeah, good luck with that…

The Tempered one is staring wearily at TCSR, and, as you can tell from that gleam in her eye, has now been named the Enemy. The Tempered one will do everything in her power to make sure the Enemy is destroyed…even if she has to take her own life…

Obsess much?

The Short One is looking at the Man. More specifically…the Short One is looking at the Man's hair. The Short One swears he can see something moving in there…

…

…Let's move on…

The Man and the Almost-Man are still glaring at each other. In fact, I don't think they've even blinked. The Almost-Man's hands are slowly gliding towards his pocket…but then stops. From the look on the Almost-Man's face, there is obviously nothing he'd rather be doing than kicking the Man's butt. But something seems to be stopping him…

…For now, anyway…

Have I been too cruel? Are you all _quivering _in suspense? Are you sitting at the edge of your chair?

Well don't go peeing in your pants from your tied up emotions! For I will now reveal the identities of those stuck in TCSR! waves flag

First off, the Blonde One. I'll give you one more try to guess before I reveal! Here are the clues…

She's blonde.

She's slow.

She can kick your ass.

She wears a Japanese school uniform, AND!

She likes…to ogle…hot…men…

If you guessed Aino Minako from Sailor Moon, THEN YOU ARE CORRECT! For the Blonde one is none other than Sailoooooooooooorrr VENUS! Insert dramatic music

Now, the Tempered One should be easy to figure out then hmmm? Shall I give you the clues one more time anyway? OKAY THEN!

She has a small temper.

She also can kick your ass.

She has brown hair.

She has named TCSR her Enemy.

She will do anything to _destroy_ her Enemy.

Got it yet? No? Well then, TOO BAD! 'Cause she's Kino Makoto from Sailor Moon! That's right, she's Sailor Venus' butt-kicking ally Sailooooooooorrr JUPITER! Insert more dramatic music

We move on to the next fandom then…have you guessed what it is?

We begin with the Shifting One! Here are the clues:

He wears a military uniform.

He has black hair, and black eyes.

His white gloves have some sort of symbol on them?

Who is he you ask? Why, he is none other than the fabulous…the hot…the sexy…the powerful…Roy MUSTANG! confetti

For the Short One, I will give you only one clue…

…he's short!

Have you gotten it? Yes, no, maybe so? Oh well! Because he is Edward Elric! more confetti

If you haven't guessed the two from our next fandom then…well…you are _really _out of touch with the world. So I'm just going to say it!

The Man is…PROFESSOR SNAPE! Boo

And the Almost-Man is… (Seriously, if you didn't guess this, turn on your bliddy television!) HARRY POTTER!

Random guy going "yay"!

So now that you know our poor six souls, we'll get back to them!

Minako is now walking toward Colonel Mustang.

Shall we have a moment for his sanity?

…

Ok then!

Colonel Mustang isn't quite sure why he is terrified of this blonde chick. Why, he is the Flame Alchemist! He is strong! He is manly! He is…screaming like a little girl…

…and trying to hide behind Ed.

Minako isn't put off by this though! She is plenty used to guys running away from her in fear! In fact, it only fuels her need to chase after the guy some more!

So of course she would simply walk up to Ed and kindly ask him to step aside so that she could talk to the tall hunk of manliness who is currently in the fetal position.

Except it went more like this…

"Hey shrimp! Why don't you move away from the hunkster so I can talk to him, hmm?"

Poor… poor…Minako.

"HEY! WHO ARE YOU CALLING A SHRIMP BLONDY! WHY I OUGHTA!"

We all know that the yelling and screaming was all that Ed would try to do. (for now)

But Makoto doesn't.

Picture this: Ed screaming at Minako.

Minako staring at Ed in fascination

Makoto reaching for Ed's throat.

Makoto grabbing Ed's throat.

Funny, eh?

"HE-"

"Don't you DARE talk to my friend like that!" Makoto screams. She adds a little more pressure to Ed's throat, and begins to shake. Luckily for Ed, Colonel Mustang chooses that time to come out of the fetal position and help him.

"This is not the time to kill Ed! We can do that later!"

Well…kinda…

Startled, Makoto drops Ed to the floor.

"Oooops…sorry, bout that!" She scratches the back of her neck nervously, "I guess I don't know my own strength!"

Ed merely foams.

At the mouth, that is.

The Flame Alchemist sighed. "Well," he thought, "someone needs to take on the leading role, and that person should be me! The almighty…the amazing…the awesome…"

"SO CUTE!"

"What?" Both Makoto and Roy scream in unison and turn to stare at Minako. She is hugging Ed to her chest and squealing.

"He's just like a little teddy bear! Awwww look at his 'iddle widdle braid! So kawaii!"

"…" Is what Roy and Makoto say.

Ed just foams some more.

And oblivious to everything going on around them, Harry and Snape (and yodel!) continue to glare at one another.

Fun times, eh?


	4. Chapter 3

A/N: Yes People, this chapter, I'm sure like many other's, is short. BUT FEAR NOT! For quality is much better than quantity!

…right?

Five minutes later, Minako was still cuddling Ed, Harry and Snape were still glaring at one another, and Roy and Makoto were still confused as hell.

"Uh…Mina…the crap?" Being the brave, butt-kicking person she was, Makoto decided to speak first.

Blinking as if she just realized she wasn't the only one in TCSR she replied, "C'mon Maki-chan! You can't deny his cuteness." This was accompanied with a hug and squeeze to the still foaming Ed.

Makoto fell strangely silent. She grew a thoughtful look on her face, and within a few minutes she happily stated, "You know I can't!"

And to Roy's mortification, she glomped Ed.

HARD.

In fact, the impact was so forceful that it brought Ed out of his lack of oxygen endorsed… situation.

"What the-!" Ed bolted out of Minako's death grasp and made a mad dash to the other side of TCSR. Unfortunately, he was too busy looking to make sure the Blonde and the Tempered One's weren't following him that he ran straight into the one and only Professor Snape.

"You Fool!" Snape seethed from his place on the ground. He gave off an extra growl when he heard the howls of laughter coming from Harry.

"Yes!" Harry gasped, clutching his side in his fit of joy, "Brilliant! Bloody Brilliant!"

"Er…You're Welcome?" Needless to say, the Full Metal Alchemist was dumbfounded. He sheepishly scratched the top of his head. "It was my pleasure!" He chirped.

Roy just stared. "Shameful!" He finally managed to spit out, "Elric, how could you abuse this fine lady so?" He stalked over to the now frozen Snape, who was still on the ground. Mustang offered his arm to the "fine lady". "Please miss," he said in oh-I'm-so-cool voice, (along with one last glare in Ed's direction.) "allow me to help you."

There was a moment of silence. For a moment, Makoto was absolutely certain that she saw Harry cut a hole through the air with some stick.

Finally, it was broken.

"I AM NOT A WOMAN!"

(Random Bunny Going Chirp)

Fifteen minutes later, Makoto had finally convinced Snape to counteract the curse he had put on Roy. Snape had taken to seething in the corner, eyeing both the Lieutenant-Colonel and Harry consecutively. Makoto and Ed were sitting across from one another, seemingly in a staring contest. Roy was standing with his back to the others, giving off bouts of nervous laughter here and there. Harry himself looked entirely pleased, and kept staring in Snape's direction from his sitting Indian style in the center of the room.

Meanwhile, Minako had herself perched on one of the many chairs placed in TCSR. She had taken a hairbrush from her space pocket, and was absent-mindedly running it through the many strands of blonde connected to her head. Eventually though, she got bored.

Which is bad.

Very Bad.

Minako began to hum. She began to hum the most annoying tune known to man kind. In fact, it was so annoying, that the five other people inhabiting TCSR began to stare at her.

Yes, Minako was humming Britney Spears.

Slowly, the five inched closer to the oblivious soldier of love. Each step they took closer to the hum-of-doom only fueled their annoyance more. The shadows of the five overcast the pretty blonde, who paused from her brushing as a sense of dread overcame her. "Uh…"

That was all she got out before she was mauled.

(Two Random Bunnies Going Chirp)

"Alright." Roy was in his leader mode. "Obviously we have all been brought here for one reason or another. What I want to know is whether or not anyone has any ideas concerning our current…location…"

All of the remaining occupants of TCSR that was white were lounged in various positions on the floor.

Needless to say, none of them were listening.

"Hey!" SNAP.

(Three Random Bunnies Going Chirp)

Minako had resumed her hair-brushing, (this time being very careful not to make any noise.) when she was interrupted by Snape coming to sit by her.

For a while, they just stared at each other. That is, until Snape said, "Look woman, we should team up together, you and I. Obviously we have both been wronged by the people in this room. Me, being called a woman by that wretched man, and you, being hog-tied for merely entertaining your self! (He of course, left out the part where he was the one who supplied to rope.) What do you say?" He leaned in closer to her, ears eagerly awaiting the answer that he was certain would come out of her.

Minako gave him a pointed look, shifted in her seat, and lightly tapped the top of his head with her brush.

"You're Creepy."

(Four Random Bunnies Going Chirp)


End file.
